Deciding if children will be allowed is almost always a big decision. However you feel about having children at a wedding, it is an increased cost and can be increased planning. (I mean, you have to have SOME means of entertaining them - and no, giving them cake and seating them near your gifts is not enough of a plan.) So for those who decide not to have children at the wedding, how do you tell people politely?
One friend, as I've mentioned before, handwrote in every invited guest's name on the RSVP line so as to avoid confusion on who was invited.
Another friend wrote an FAQ portion of her printed invites with this verbiage for children:
Q. Is this an all ages event?
A. Unfortunately, the size of the venue, general "adult nature" of the wedding and reception limit the attendance. We know that this may be a turn-off for some, but we sincerely hope that it won't prevent you from coming to celebrate with us. We will try to help you arrange convenient childcare for the evening. And who knows... that option might end up being more popular and fun than the wedding and reception themselves.
If you read my RSVP post, you know I left myself wide open for people just telling us how many extra guests they'd be bringing. As such, we ended up having a lot of post-invite conversations and finally decided to allow family to bring children, but no one else (despite the fact that we intended on not allowing children, period).
If you decide to allow some children but not all, make sure there are clear demarcations (like siblings' kids only, etc) so that other people are clearly understand (and are not cornering you) why you aren't allowing their children to come.
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